Month: July 2013

I’m a Published Author! What, What!

That was me raising the roof. I know it’s out of style and my sisters both roll their eyes at me when I do it, but it is really fun. You should try it. Ok, fine, let’s do it together The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire. We don’t need no water let the mother f*cker burn, burn mother f*ucker.

Well that got out of hand quick.

I’m gonna get straight in your pants today- no foreplay.

Okay, maybe a little, I’m not a selfish lover. Yes I am.

Have you ever been so happy about something you feel like you could eat it? I felt that way when I got my dog. I think it’s called love. Why the need to put everything I love in my mouth? I dunno, ask Freud. But when I saw my book finally approved and available to purchase on Amazon, I almost swallowed my computer whole.

My book, Axing My Exes is published! It is available in print and ebook at and Check out the links.

Amazon Author Profile:

Createspace Paperback:

Amazon Print version:

I am not sure I can even express how excited I am for all of you to read it! But the one thing I have realized is- if I ever have a baby, and love it more than this, I should be watched 24/7. I can just see the headlines, Elf-sized new mother swallows baby whole. I guess no publicity is bad publicity, right?

Line up your elbows for the biggest high five of the year. Solid.

Enjoy the book! Share it! Like it on FB (Axing My Exes), Check it out on, talk about it, blog about it, laugh and love with it!

Can I get another what, what?!