Warning: This post isn’t about Pee Wee’s Playhouse or Batman’s sexual dungeon.
Sorry. I’m also disappointed.
Today I’d like to talk to y’all bout something I like to call ‘peer pressure’. Not in the general sense, just in relation to make-up-less selfies. But to bring it back to PP for a moment: I am In. To. It. Not the bullying kind, but the encouraging version. I’ve had some of the best experiences of my existence because I’ve been forced into them. For example: The Houdini, a coin termed by a friend who made me literally run from a guy at a bar when he turned away. Vanished right before his eyes. Thrill of my life. And of course that time when I salsa danced centre stage; without being dared to do 6 tequila shots in 6 minutes- I would have remembered it.
Back to you taking pictures of yourself.
Experts say selfies are harmful due to the increase in narcissism and decrease in self-confidence. But really, if you didn’t get 20 likes or more, you’re a revolting trash bag and should probably start your downward drug spiral right now.
The weird thing about me is that my favorite shots of a girl are the hobo chic ones. You know, a hot chick who can get down in a dirty alley-way – I’m not disgusted. I’m turned on. The worst are the bitties who take selfies right after they’ve put on 7 layers of foundation, 40 mins of mascara and 25 mins of perfecting the liquid eyeliner, but only 10 seconds of lip puckering…you’re not fish-like enough! I want more fish!
Sorry if that plus the seafood comment made you puke. I understand. And to the girl with melanoma…no thanks…you look like a doll who just experienced anal for the first time.
If I wanted to be this frightened, I’d go back to my parents house where my mom had a doll-like decoration (undoubtedly strategically placed) staring at me in bed. So I hid it. P.s mom, if you’re looking for her…the bride of chucky is face down behind the air purifier. Eye roll. Mom did that just to make me feel less comfortable at home so I wouldn’t stay long-term. I know your tricks, Joyce.
So now, thankfully, the social media world has made a petition to make selfies an actually selfie of a self who looks like a human being, and for a good cause…in the no makeup selfie challenge. Anything supporting cancer research, I’ll be on-board with. Even if I do think the challenge should be re-named: who would make the best lesbian. Ting ting ting … Miley Cyrus, you win.
I’d do it.
Have a super fun weekend, people! I’ll be going to an actual suasage fest. The food kind. Unfortunately.
Follow my photographed happenings on Instagram: JerrZee
Line it up yo!